One of the first major concerns for me when I had the idea of becoming a massage therapist a few years ago was: how would ladies react to me – a not so young, balding man with a beard and body that never came too close to a gym routine – wanting to massage them? Was it feasible for me to even attempt the studies? Luckily, my fears where not grounded – well, not too much at least. Let me share some of my experiences:
I will get to the nipple stands later, for now let me start with the quote from the title of this post which was a suggestion from an American website I found during my research into the problem. The author was adamant that, even if a lady was lying face down for a back massage but left her brazier on, you have to ask her if you may open it. While I can understand the sentiment when doing a manipulating sport massage, I could never get used to the idea of this during a wellness massage. The last thing you want to do after spending half an hour relaxing the client (who at this point is lying on her back) by working on the front arms and legs, is to call her out of her dream world with a kind of ‘obvious’ question, after she has turned around to lie on her front. I tried it once or twice but soon gave up on that.
Our clients at the spa, where I worked for the last two years, were encouraged to send comment e-mails to a website we collaborated with. One lady wrote: “… and then I was massaged by this creepy guy … although the massage was very good…” I had to smile. I know I am not George Clooney or Brad Pitt, but creepy?? Anyway, from that day on my nickname at the spa was ‘Creepy Guy’. Well, at least she acknowledged that Creepy Guy still gave her a good massage 🙂 (Later on my nickname changed to Stud Manager – but that’s another story…)
One day a boss and his staff came to the spa. I was assigned to work with the man while Louisa and my other female colleagues treated the ladies. The next year I heard that they would not be coming back as the poor boss felt “traumatized” because a man had touched him. If it wasn’t so funny it would actually be sad that people would rather endure three ‘traumatizing’ treatments instead of just opening their mouth and asking for another therapist. Often ladies did say something though. When I was assigned to them they would ask for someone else (or chase me out of the room 🙂 ) I respected that every time and as you might have gathered, I did not take any negative comment or request personally.
I know this post is getting a bit long but before you think that I only had negative experiences – they definitely were in the minority – let me just tell you about one episode that of course tickled my ego. After having worked at the spa for a while, there were a number of ladies who would specifically ask for me and I often received compliments about my massages. Comments like “You have healing hands!” and “You touched my soul!” confirmed to me that I was on the right track with this new direction in my life. And that is also why I will interrupt my pilgrimage with seminars and further training workshops, to learn new techniques and widen the horizon.
A mother and her two adult daughters came to spend the day at the spa one Saturday. By chance the youngest daughter was assigned to me for the first treatment. For their second treatment the mother had chosen Aromatherapy and as I was well trained in that, the other therapists and I decided that I would take her for the treatment. I was standing by at the cubicle as Louisa went to fetch them from the relaxation area. At the cubicles the older daughter wanted to come straight to my door. Louisa politely explained that the mother was to go to me. The daughter said: “Oh, in the break we had a little tiff about who’s chance it was going to be to get the man next. But it’s okay. I’ll give her the precedence seeing that it is her birthday.” For the first time in my life I had ladies ‘fighting’ over ME. Wow, what an experience and boost for the ego!! Needless to say, the mother got an extra special massage for her birthday! 🙂
And then of course there was the day when I realized that the blanket started to rise. I was just innocently working on her arms when the lady had a noticeable nipple stand. “Yeeeehaaa!” I thought, “Today I am doing something really right! When you’re good, you’re gooood!”